Show don’t tell July 31, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Writing.Tags: description, Writing, writing technique, writing tips
1 comment so far
So, one of the hardest things to do as a writer is to show instead of telling. Let me give you an example.
Bob was big and tall. (That is telling the reader)
Bob was so big and tall he was like a fat giraffe. (Slightly better but still telling the reader by using a simile)
When Bob walked in the room, I suddenly felt like I was in a Barbie playhouse. He would sit in my loveseat for two and would barely leave space for his own wallet. He could sit at one end of the room and still toast his feet by the fire when he stretched out.
Okay, so i’m not good at it either, but you get the point. It’s hard to do.
In normal conversation, we don’t talk like this. We say Bob was big and tall and we leave it at that. Most people don’t ask the follow up question, “How big and tall was he?”
The readers won’t ask that question either. But if you can paint the picture for them, the story suddenly becomes alive, they have an image in their head and you helped place it there.
Now the reader is picturing Bob ducking as he stands up, maybe even almost knocking over lamps, etc as he moves around in this Barbie playhouse.
So it got me thinking, when writing stories, how often do we take the simple route and say something cliche like:
Strong as an ox
Tall as a giraffe
White as a ghost
Eats like a bird
Snores like a buzz saw
Cliches are useful in conversation, but paint no pictures in story telling.
The trick is to show people how strong, tall, fat, short, stupid, smart, handsome, etc.
That’s why Yo Mamma jokes are so funny.
Yo Momma was so ugly, I took her to the zoo and the guy at the front gate said, “Thanks for bringing her back!”
Anyway, you get the picture.
Jason
Dodgeball with the Titans: a child’s perspective. July 29, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Writing.Tags: children, descriptive writing, Dodgeball, Games, Gods, Mythology
1 comment so far
Two squares, two halves of the field, separated to do battle, for honor and glory. We stand here, our rag-tag little army comprised of seven to seventeen year olds. We stand on the back line like sprinters, waiting for the whistle, the balls on the center line, waiting like shiny little easter egg surprises, two nerf footballs and three nerf round balls, 3″ in diameter.
Further across the way stand the parents, the providers of my safety, my house, my sustenance, my aunts and my uncles. However, they look different, a dangerous glint in the eyes, something is different.
The whistle sounds, we kids sprint with all our youthful excitement, trained on the playgrounds of America, we fly across the field, confident in our seizing of the nerf projectiles. But something is not right. The parents move with uncanny swiftness. Realizing that we will not reach the line in time, we dig in our heels and back-pedal like madmen. Those that had committed too much went down with alarming alacrity. Three had fallen within seconds of the whistle, granted we outnumbered the parents five to one.
There was no time to mourn, the parents moved liked ghosts our feeble attempts sailed past wisps of where the parents used to be.
The parents brought down pain like gods throwing lighting. Images of Zeus, Odin, and Thor went racing through my mind. Kids were falling left and right. I could see a parent holding two nerf balls in one hand and watched as he hurled them with such velocity that they blurred in flight. The nerf balls split in two like some wicked spell cast upon us and I watched as another kid went down in utter dodgeball humiliation.
Groin shots, head shots, dual hits, they called them like Babe Ruth pointing out home runs. I wanted to avert my eyes, but the carnage mesmerized me.
We huddled at the back line, using each other for shields, all loyalty gone out the window. We watched and waited for darkness to descend.
Okay, so that’s not exactly how my seven year old daughter saw it. In fact, i don’t know how she saw it, but i can only imagine, at seven years old, how scary a stupid nerf dodgeball game could be when facing off against the parents.
The truth of the matter is this. My daughter was the last one left standing with three adult males on the other side. We could have riddled her with nerf balls like a 1920’s gangland shooting. But instead, we let her win and faked utter incompetence.
The children chanted her name, hoisted her upon their shoulders and celebrated the day they brought the gods to their knees.
Jason
I’m all about the people. July 10, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Characters.Tags: Characters, Neil Gaiman, Neverwhere, Star Wars, Writing, writing tips
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So this is my new blog theme, writing. I have one observation and I think others share this view.
I can come up with endless ideas and plot lines. Fancy little twists and story ideas. But that will not get me very far in writing, or at least will not make my writing memorable or enjoyable.
If you think back on the books you remember most, the movies that are your favorites, it’s the characters that you related to, not the story.
Strong quirky characters that you can root for. You don’t necessarily have to relate to them as people, but you have to care enough about them to care about the story.
They could even be villians. I think back fondly about Mr. Croup and Mr. Vandemar (Neil Gaiman’s book Neverwhere). I can’t forget those two gentlemen.
I think about Star Wars, the first three. Han Solo was an amazing character, rich in detail. The second three Star Wars movies were not very memorable at all. They seemed to rely on special effects instead of good old fashion story telling. (I personally think that George Lucas is overrated)
So this is what I struggle with, ways to come up with interesting characters. In fact, i want to write a story where the character comes first and the story idea comes second. That never happens for me.
-Jason-
How good is your Kung Fu? July 8, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in 1.Tags: Cliches, Karate, Kung Foo, Martial Arts, Movies
3 comments
I like martial arts movies. I think martial arts are cool, but let’s face it. There are too many cliches when it comes to the ancient arts of fighting as they are portrayed in the movies. The movies tend to not portray things realistically. Yeah, I’m sorry, i hate to burst your bubble. But let’s take a look at the common recurring themes when it comes to martial arts.
1. An ancient/Old Asian man will take on an American youngster and teach him everything he knows. – Hey, I lived in Japan for two years and I didn’t have any old Asian guys offering to teach me a thing. Not even the proper way to hold my chopsticks!
2. When a Kung Fu master fights multiple opponents, they all take turns attacking him. – Is this some sort of unwritten code? Why don’t they jump him all at once and beat his ass down?
3. Eventually the master will die, leaving the apprentice to soul search and find the final lesson within himself.- No way, the kid would freak out because he never got his diploma or something and he would never feel complete, then he would get his ass kicked by every bully in school.
4. The master knows some crazy ancient powers that have been lost to the western world. – Like slapping your hands together and rubbing them to generate heat that will heal wounds and broken bones. But they can’t figure out how to grow facial hair? Or maybe they are suppressing the growth through ancient ninja powers?
5. Really good masters can dodge bullets and catch arrows. – Has anyone ever shot a ninja? Speak up! Anyone?
6. Any object taken into the hand, automatically becomes a weapon and a true master will be proficient with it. – A plunger? A coat hanger? A balloon animal? Man I would feel stupid if I got beat down by a balloon animal!
Let me tell you the secret to martial arts success. Listen to this song everyday, and nobody will beat you.
Jason
Book Review – Monster Blood Tattoo July 8, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Books.Tags: Authors, Books, Reading
2 comments
Those of you who know me, know that I like to read, a lot. And when I get excited about a book, i want others to read it as well.
Are you one of those people who are sad because the Harry Potter series is over? I have a new author for you to read.
D.M. Cornish has written two books in a series that has totally caught my imagination.
If you like authors that are into world building, (ala Tolkien) then you’ll love this. Our hero Rossamund lives in a world where people are constantly at odds with monsters. In fact many professions require monster fighting skills.
Follow the adventures of one little boy as he is caught up in the politics of the day, while fighting monsters and making friends with the strangest people.
The characters are rich and interesting and this moves the plot along at a rapid pace. Book two is better than book one, but you have to start at the beginning and book three isn’t out yet, but if you finish the first two, then you’ll have to pick up the third.
So to all my friends out there, i recommend monster blood tattoo. Come on! Some of you know, i’ve never steered you wrong in the past when it comes to book recommendations.
BW
Top 5 Lame Sports July 7, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Sports.Tags: badminton, bowling, field hockey, handball, spelling bee, Sports
4 comments
As Americans, we have our traditional sports that we like. In the U.S. they are traditionally, Baseball, Basketball and Football, not necessarily in that order. But if you like sports in general and love the thrill of competition and the athleticism it takes to excel, then some excellent sports have happened in the last couple of weeks.
A thrilling Eurocup 2008 was completed a couple of weeks ago, an exciting Wimbeldon was just finished and the Tour de France is going on right now.
With the Olympics looming around the corner, I began to think of sports that just should not be considered sports. Some of these are games played in a backyard, but should not be given television time and definitely should not have commentators talking about them. Here are the top 5 sports that should not be called “sports”!
1. Badminton – It’s like tennis for wussies. Let’s give you a smaller court so you don’t have to run as much and we’ll give you a shuttlecock (it should be banned as a sport for that terminology alone!) that when you hit it hard, it really doesn’t go very fast. Be careful, don’t get hurt.
2. Field Hockey – Just play soccer why don’t you? Did you know they have a world cup in this sport? Neither did I. What would make this more exciting is if they could club each other with the stick. Then I would consider it a sport.
3. Bowling – Name a famous or legendary bowler. Can’t do it, can you? I could improve this game. Allow the players to shot put their balls at the pins, then add a person from the other team to play goalie. Let the hi-jinx ensue!
4. Handball – They can’t decide if they should be dribbling, running with the ball or passing. This seems like another rip off of soccer. Try putting a basketball in a tiny hoop while dribbling with every step you babies! Does anyone every get hit in the nards with the ball in this sport? I want to see that!
5. Spelling Bee – I only mention this because it’s shown on ESPN. Home-schooled, socially retarted adolescents sweating in front of cameras. B-O-R-I-N-G. Improvement? Try spelling as people in the audience pelt you with bean bags and rubber balls. Now that I would watch!
So there you have it, some sports that should have remained just games. They should be removed from the olympics or ESPN because they are not hard enough, not sexy enough or not nearly violent enough to merit my viewing time.
When is dodgeball going to be a sport?
BW
Coming at ya straight out of the bottle! July 3, 2008
Posted by bluewendigo in Mythology.Tags: Barbara Eden, Djinn, Geneology, Genie, Mythology
3 comments
So i was talking to some friends about Geneology (the study of one’s ancestry) but they way one of my friends pronounced it, it sounded like Genieology (the study of Genies).
I thought that was cool, i wondered if I had any Genies in my ancestry. Genie is the English translation of the Arabic term Jinni, Also sometimes spelled as Djinn.
In Middle-Eastern mythology, Djinn are the spirits of smokeless fire and they usually take good or bad paths, just like humans.
If they are bad and punished they are sometimes tied to objects, like bottles and can only be released through special incantations.
So if you have any bottles that have been in the family for a long time. You may want to see if you have any Djinn in your ancestry. Check up on your Genieology.
And if you have a Genie in your family and she looks like Barbara Eden in the 60’s. Call me!
BW
